It's Autumn Time, It's Autumn Time

There are many things I love about fall, not the least of which is seeing the old men sitting on the corner of their lawn with their straw hats on with a big sign that says "Pinenuts for Sale."

In addition to the funny old men, there is also the beauty of the leaves. We went driving in the canyon a few weeks ago and this is what we saw:

The other thing about fall that I love is painstakingly tracing the lines of a famous person's face into a vegetable and then setting up a candle shrine to them.

Yep, fall is my favorite.

Aging

Sam's birthday is coming up and I like to tell him he is facing the leap into middle aged-ness. Although lately, we've both discovered some serious signs that youth is fleeting and that time remorselessly marches on. Someone once said, "old age is fearsome to the young." Me. I said that. Just now.

Example A:

We went to a carnival a few weeks ago. One of those traveling kind where part of the fun is that you suspect the rides will fall apart at any second and probably did a few years ago and the deaths that ensued were quickly hushed up, the carnival changed its name, and that guy running the ferris wheel grew a beard to disguise his identity. Anyway, Sam and I rode the Zipper. You sit in a cage built for two that spins head over heels while all the cages travel in a big fast oval. Ok, so, I rode this at a carnival two years back and had no problems. Thought it was great. This time, it started spinning and I hated every second. I was going to puke, it made my head hurt, and all my energy was focused toward keeping my body from exploding into a million pieces. Later that evening, Sam offered to get us some funnel cakes and due to the fact that I was still feeling nauseated, I said no. To funnel cakes.

Example B:

We went to the skating rink last night for a ward party. We had every intention of skating after eating the provided hot dogs. However, it appeared that most of the adults were content to sit and chat over their Sprites while letting their children take care of the skating part. Sam and I looked at each other in confusion. Were we not supposed to skate? Was there an age limit? We decided to skate anyway but we were in company with very few adults. And, it took a long time to get steady on the skates. Longer than I care to remember. And when I say steady, I really mean that we made it around the rink but slowly and shakily.

Example C:

We've been teaching Primary the last few months, which is a perfectly normal and acceptable calling for a young married couple. Emphasis on young. Yes, but last Sunday Sam was called to be in the Elders' Quorum presidency instead. In a family ward! That is a mature calling if I ever heard one.

You see? How can we not be aware of our own aging? As someone else once said, "Old age comes on suddenly, and not gradually as is thought." That one was Emily Dickinson, in case you thought I only quoted myself.

Fantasy

I had a dream last night that I went to a spray tan place and not only did I come out with beautifully bronzed skin, I also somehow had perfectly sculpted abs, flawless (and completely hairless) skin, and blonde hair.

Um, Krista, stereotype much?

The beginnings of a Boston Tea Party

Why do I resent being told to use my personal relationships (online or otherwise) for someone else? I am trying to examine myself for hypocrisy here. Am I just resenting it because of who told me? Or the fact that I was told instead of asked? Well, I've promoted friends' films or shows. I've asked friends to visit other friends' websites. I like to help my loved ones out, especially if they need it.

So it must be because I was told to do so by someone I take no personal pleasure in helping. Is that wrong in and of itself? Should I want to help anyone and everyone? Even if I don't agree with the cause?

I try to retain a sense of myself on the internet. I try to avoid bad choices and always be kind and good. I'm not always the best at this, I've made some mistakes and hurt people before through my internet behaviors, including myself. However, most of the time I try to realize that other people read what I write and can be affected by it. I try to keep a tight rein on myself so that I keep the world a happy place while still being myself at the same time.

So what I don't like here is that I'm being told what to say and do and then I am expected to take full responsibility for the consequences that arise from it. It feels like a little chink in my integrity.

Just a little chink. But still.

Transportation

In the last month or so, we have done this to our car:
-replaced a battery terminal (cost: $3)
-jumped it 3 different times with varying success (cost: free)
-re-installed the battery terminal at least 5 times (cost: Sam's sanity)
-towed (cost: $50)
-replaced the starter (cost: $350)
-jumped it 2 more times (cost: my sanity)
-tested the battery at Auto Zone, result? bad battery (cost: free)
-replaced the battery (cost: free due to warranty)
-tested the alternator at Auto Zone, result? bad alternator (cost: free)
-replaced the alternator (or we will today, hopefully) (cost: $150)

The radio is doing funny things which may indicate some sort of minor electric problem, the AC switches to defrost if you are revving past 3000 rpms, and we should probably replace the tires before our road trip for Thanksgiving Break.

And we need an oil change.

In better news:
-we bought all healthy things at the grocery store last night. We are quite proud of ourselves. Whole wheat hamburger buns, I mean really, how much healthier can you be?

-we got electric toothbrushes for ourselves and hello, what a strange feeling. Sam swears his teeth feel so much cleaner although mine feel the same, probably because I'm a better brusher than him... still, I believe the package when it says it cleans better than any manual toothbrush ever could.
-I saw a successful-looking older man at a stoplight next to me open his car door, stick out his bare foot, and proceed to put on his business socks and shoes. I thought I was the only one that late to work.
-today is payday and just in time to pay for the glamorous makeover our car insisted on. What a diva.

Winter Wonderland

Today is the last day of summer and I certainly felt it this morning. I woke up shivering under my light blanket, with the fan blowing and the window open. I turned on the heat in my car driving to work. THE HEAT. I'm sitting in long pants, a jacket, and a scarf and my hands are almost too numb to type efficiently (although let's be honest, I'm usually colder than the general population, plus I work in a freezer. Basically).

I know the last day of summer for most people is a time for nostalgia as they look back on all their adventures in the sun with their flip flop tan lines and cute sunglasses as they road-tripped across the US. I, on the other hand, found summer to be pretty similar to winter, other than the fact that we planted ourselves in front of our fan instead of our space heater. Is that sad? My swimsuit never saw the outside of its drawer. My skin never felt the touch of sunburn. I never slept anywhere but in my own bed. On one hand, I had a lot of fun doing random things with Sam but on the other, almost none of those things had anything to do with the fact that it was summer.

What does this say about my life? Does it matter that my summer vacation was pushed to Thanksgiving Break? Isn't it better that by December, my skin will be so white that it will scare young children instead of the tan beginnings of skin cancer? If one does not attend school, then why is summer defined as the time for fun anyway?

So bring it on, cold! I love your changing leaves, your first snow fall. I love the scarves and beautiful coats and boots you make me wear. I live for hot chocolate, new episodes of my favorite shows, fires in the fireplace, heavy quilts. I like waking up in the darkness of morning and the cozy feeling of warming up in the shower. I can't wait for Christmas music, colored lights, and the smell of cinnamon and pine.

So tonight when I shut the window and turn off the fan, I'll remember that spiders die in winter. How can it not be my favorite season?

Our piece of the pie

Today in the mail we received a lawsuit settlement check. Wow it feels good to type that! Once in college while walking to class during the winter, I slipped on the ice in front of a Dairy Queen. For maybe two minutes I fantasized about great riches raining down upon me all because I was humiliated by some ice. Not hurt, mind you. Just humiliated. But today my dreams of lawsuits, litigation, and settlement checks have come true.

In the amount of $13.48. Cha-ching!

We are living the American dream, and let me tell you, it is sweet.

*Image from Chicagoland Television

Happy birthday

My little blog child is one year old today! They grow up so quickly! I'm not being the legal guardian that I should, though. Weeks between posts, long periods of time "under construction," disappearing headers. Hopefully one year old is still young enough to bounce back and maybe even forget some of the neglect I have shown.

Is it though? HAVE I RUINED YOU FOREVER?!?!? Only time will tell, I suppose. Maybe I'll buy love with cake.

Image from perfectduluthday

I hope that worked. Because really, resilence in a blog child is all shown in the readership. And readership probably isn't so enticed by a digital photo of birthday cake. Just know I gave you a real slice in my heart.

In another year on this day, I hope that the future looks even brighter than now. If we're very lucky, I'll be close to quitting my job, close to buying a house maybe?, and close close close to having a real child to avoid neglecting. Dreams are big.

Just like my blog child will be at age 2. Pretty please?

Change in the air

Guess what folks! This blog has a url of its own now! How exciting!

www.paintingtheair.com

I know! Moving up in the world!

Anyway, if you happen to be one of those fantastic people who links to my blog somewhere, go ahead and and change the link to www.paintingtheair.com. I'm pretty sure the old url still works, but what's the point of a shiny new one if we're all just going to use the old one? No point at all.

And sometime soon I'll get around to changing the header to something more deserving of its own url (if only a nice book in bed wasn't so tempting!)

In the meantime, thanks for reading!

Right Where I'm Meant to Be

Yesterday I was driving home from work and Edwin Mccain's "I Could Not Ask for More" came on the radio. I'm pretty sure that it was my prom theme song one year and so I started thinking about high school. And college. And pretty much my past in general. I thought about those times when, right in the moment, it wasn't quite perfect or it was dramatic or hard. But now? Now, mostly what I have are great memories. I have met some amazing people. I've had some amazing chances to grow. I've been really happy in my life.

I'm really happy right now too! Sam makes life wonderful every day. So do my family and friends. And very much so does the gospel of Jesus Christ. I hope I take more time as life continues to be really grateful for all the life experiences I get to have. Living is awesome! Such a blessing. I'll meet more people and I'll have more chances to grow. I'll make more and more memories. So really, my point is that as true as it is right now that I could not ask for more, it was true at prom, it was true during finals in college, and it will certainly be true tomorrow. And fifty years from now.

Maybe, if you're a little bit discouraged, listen to this song and remember every moment you possibly can from your life. And then tell me if the good doesn't outweigh the bad by a million percent. And perhaps, you might say a little prayer that goes like this: "Thank you!!!!" Because I'm definitely going to.

I Could Not Ask For More - Edwin Mccain

Dreaming

A couple of nights ago I had a dream that scared me enough that I woke up and had to cling to Sam to go back to sleep. In it, I was warned that an unseen person named Paul Dodd was going to try to get my knife from me and kill me. Sure enough, he did try to do just that. I woke up unharmed, of course, but with a very real sense of dread about this Paul Dodd person. When I was telling Sam about in the morning, he asked who is Paul Dodd? I had no idea. Where did I get that name? That terrible, terrible name?

Yesterday I answered the phone at my office. "Can I ask who is calling?" I said. "Yes, this is Paul Dodd." It took all I had not to slam the phone down and scream bloody murder.

My subconscious thinks it's hilarious.

Fairy tale

Some nights Sam goes to play basketball with his friends. And on those nights, I like to rent a chick flick, get myself some comfort food (i.e. chinese takeout and/or oatmeal cookies), and curl up in bed with the laptop.

And just when I'm all in the lovey mood from the onscreen romance, my lovely sweaty handsome funny sexy worn out charming husband comes home.

Yep, much better than any chick flick. Even with chinese takeout.

Etiquette

When we went to see a local fireworks show on Saturday night, I looked forward to some cozy romantic time with Sam (it was a reenactment of our first date, after all). We picked a nice spot, a good distance from the various children and their glowsticks, and snuggled under our blanket. Unfortunately, two minutes into the show, three couples basically sat on our heads as we laid there on the grass and then proceeded to discuss each other's lives in great detail through the whole show. A: I found it hard to focus on the wonder that is fireworks and B: I didn't really want to know that the Kennecott Copper Mine is boring, or that one of them is banned from IFA for stealing a pearl snap when she was 15, or that Alta is a cute name for the baby girl on the way. And yet I know all of this. Intimately. Like I was part of the conversation. Except I was a prisoner of their conversation, rather than a willing volunteer.

Am I alone in thinking that there is such a thing as a distance minimum when in public spaces? How can it not occur to people that sitting down right next to a stranger and then proceeding to spill your life story as if the stranger were your best friend may not be pleasant to the stranger? It is my rule never to sit closer than 6 or 7 feet to someone I don't know unless it is absolutely necessary, in which case I do not conduct conversations that others are forced to listen to! Perhaps I am too private but no, I definitely enjoy sharing my tender feelings with all of you. Difference! No one makes you read this! Unless somehow somewhere someone is using my blog as a form of torture in order to get secret information out of somebody. In which case, I apologize. Deeply. And I promise never to go off about Bronco Mendenhall and his "uptight, deep doctrinal ways." Because being forced to listen to THAT is just too much.

Reunion

Two weeks from today I will be going here

to wait for him

to step off the plane from here.

Huzzah!

Stages

Sometimes I feel like everybody and their mother is having a baby and it kind of makes me want one too. I mean, now that it's an option and all (because we sent the stork a wedding invitation so he knows where we live....), it's tempting. Occasionally.

Still, life is pretty sweet as is. And while I realize that babies are wonderful and fulfilling and worth all the sacrifice, etc. etc., I'm rather pleased with the opportunity right now to run to the store on a whim and buy a box of Klondike bars, and then eat them while continuing the daily Boggle tournament with Sam (we play every day, usually 5-7 games, and we're very evenly matched as well as quite competitive. It was a good birthday present, this Boggle game). If we had a baby, we'd have to do stuff like get it all buckled in its carseat, then carry it through the store, then hope it is content and/or sleeping while we try to crush each other's vocabulary self-esteem. And as I hear, it is more likely that none of that would work out.

So right now, I'm enjoying the coziness of a two-person family. Right now I can choose to play Boggle with my lover instead of making dinner for a small person that can't reach the freezer for a Klondike bar like the rest of us. And right now, that is exactly enough to make life happy.